The journey of a married Mormon man who is attracted to other men.
Tuesday, August 14, 2012
That is a good thing!
This summer has been filled with some pretty rough times with our young adult children - serious and difficult challenges for us and them to fight through and overcome. Sometimes when we are in the middle of these struggles it is hard to see where "it gets better", but we haven't given up hope.
On the way home from a family reunion the other night, my wife and I had time to ride in the car and contemplate the joys and challenges of our siblings and their young adult children, and we naturally fell into the comparison mode in measuring our childrens' joys and challenges against theirs. We shouldn't, but we couldn't help it. When you're in the middle of such a fight for survival of your children, it is a natural thing for parents to do.
There was a moment of silence and then my wife said soberly...
"Haven't we suffered enough? Why is this life so hard? I don't know how much more I can take. Is there anything good in my life?"
I smiled, and said, "Well, I can think of one thing that is good!"
"What's that?" she quietly asked.
"Well," I grinned, "you still have me. Through it all, I have chosen to stay. I have chosen to be with you to the end. I am still here at your side. I haven't left, despite it all, despite my attractions, my bromantic desires, my physical needs... I am still here with you to help you through these hard times with our kids... together. And I'm not going anywhere!"
She took my left hand from the steering wheel and squeezed it tightly and reassuringly.
"That is a good thing!" she whispered through her tears.