Needed down time...

I testify that there is true wisdom in getting away from the normal routine, the grind and worries of daily life, the struggles, the pressure and stress. That is why there are planned breaks in school, vacations, or simply down time.

I've taken some personal down time away from this Blog and this community, away from the uneasiness and loneliness that persists in constantly feeling like you don't really fit in anywhere or with anyone, and have come back feeling better about many things. I don't know how long this feeling will last (a day? a week?) before I revert back to my normal angsty self, but it's been good.

I downloaded the photos I took (including the one above) and noted the feeling I had inside me when I'd look into the eyes of the photo of my wife... Somehow, looking at her in this imagine before me stirred overwhelming feelings and emotions that I haven't felt for a long time, feelings that make me want to be better, and to do things that won't cause her any more hurt or pain... to strengthen my resolve to be the person that she sees in me instead of the person that I know is me.

The concept of a Sabbatical (one year off every seven) seems very fitting. What if we all took a year off? I've read the book about the family that did take a year off and traveled together around the world... I think it's called "A Year Off" or something like that. Anyway, I think I could get used to the Sabbatical concept. Just think of the spiritual and physical renewal, the intellectual pursuits and stimulating adventures, the cultural and service opportunities... While on vacation, we attended church at the local branch. A couple spoke about how they had moved to this island where we were visiting and had decided to take a two year vacation away from their family (they were newly empty nesters) for a spiritual reawakening. It sounded all so very surreal and yet, there they were bearing their testimonies about this adventure they were on together for the next two years.

I don't know that I'll ever get to that point of financial stability or independence, and if I do, it won't be living on an island (as paradisaical as it may seem - even paradise can get old if you're not doing something worthwhile). No, definitely not. Yet, we all need a break.

Sunday allows most of us to take that weekly break. I treasure Sundays. There is a spirit of renewal and I like that. Just sometimes, however, once a week isn't quite long enough...

Now, a year in Italy or Southern France somewhere... now I could handle that!