I am having a really hard time figuring out how to articulate how things are going. It is too simple to say that things are going "well", as that really doesn't mean much, but it's true - I'm feeling at peace with my relationship with my wife right now.
Our time away was very timely and I came to a realization of sorts that revealed to me that she is not nearly as worried about my "attractions" or my "sexual performance" issues as I am. She is much more worried about where my heart is. As basic as this seems (and it feels silly to blog about because it is so basic), this revelation has brought peace to me. As long as I want her in my life, and as long as we are emotionally connected and my heart is hers, the other issues (that seem so enormous and insurmountable at times in my mind) aren't as disastrous or deal-breaking as I may think they are.
This doesn't change the fact that my desires are as strong as they've always been - I still want and need a guyfriend, guys-who-are-my-friend-in-an-intimate-bromancing-way - and I need to keep in perspective those desires (which are real and not going away) while still giving my heart to her.
This paradoxical situation hasn't changed. But somehow, we've progressed where the angst has decreased a bit in our relationship as we've moved to a new understanding of each other's needs.